Pregnancy announcements are never easy when you’re trying to conceive, but one which has swamped the media and is this morning taking up endless pages of many newspapers is particularly difficult to avoid. What makes this announcement even more challenging is that the Royal couple were only married a matter of months ago, and seem to have conceived with effortless ease.
It was unfortunate that the announcement came during Baby Loss Awareness Week, on a day when many people were preparing to light candles for the Wave of Light in memory of their own losses. Although the couple have been criticised online for this, the most likely reason is that they simply didn’t know the significance of the day.
The endless discussions about the Royal pregnancy are going to go on – and on, and on – during the next few months. One of the best ways of dealing with that is to spend time with other people who understand how you feel about this because they share similar experiences. Why not try one of Fertility Network UK’s fertility groups which run across the UK? They’re an ideal opportunity to meet others and can be really empowering. I admit I am biased about this as I run the group in South East London, but that’s because I know how much it can help. Being with other people who understand, and who share your conflicted feelings about pregnancy announcements can make all the difference. It can help you to realise that you are not having a personality change and becoming an unkind person, but are reacting in a perfectly normal way to an emotional challenge. You can find details of all FNUK’s groups here, and it there isn’t a group near you, they can offer other support too – have a look at their website
I wanted to add a post this week for Baby Loss Awareness Week. Today, October 15, is the international Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day and this evening everyone can take part in a “Wave of Light” by lighting a candle at 7pm to remember all the babies who have died during pregnancy, at, during or after birth.
Experiencing a miscarriage or losing a baby is a devastating thing to happen to anyone, but if you’ve been finding it difficult to get pregnant and have been trying to conceive for a while before this happened, it is a very bitter double blow.
By lighting a candle tonight, you can join a ‘Wave of Light’ around the world in memory of all the babies who have been lost. You can be join together with others by taking a photo of your candle and post it to Facebook or Twitter using #WaveOfLight at 7pm.
If you are in or near London and are experiencing involuntary childlessness, you may be interested in a weekend workshop run by fertility counsellor Gill Tunstall.
Running in SW8 on October 18th and 19th, it is for anyone who has experienced infertility, failed fertility treatment, miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, premature menopause, stillbirth, terminations for medical reasons or otherwise neonatal death, or unwanted childlessness–whatever the cause, including lack of a partner. The intention is to allow participants to explore their emotions, and to open up the possibility of moving on in their life.
Women, men and couples are welcome. Partners are particularly encouraged to attend, and all sexual orientations are welcome.