Dealing with today

It’s one of the most difficult times of the year for anyone trying to conceive, and it’s here again. A day focused on celebrating motherhood is bound to be challenging for anyone who is longing for a family, and it’s virtually impossible to escape when every local shop seems to have jumped on the commercial bandwagon. Mother’s Day can act as a horrible reinforcement of the sense of isolation and loneliness that you may feel as more and more of those around you seem to be pregnant or new parents. It can make you feel like an outsider whose life has become cut off form those around you.

If you know anyone else who is experiencing difficulties getting pregnant or who doesn’t have children, this can be the ideal time for meeting up with them. Getting together for a day out, a trip to the cinema or sharing a meal can be a good way of reminding yourself that you are not alone. There are around 3.5 million people in the UK alone who are going through difficulties at any given time, and every one of them will be experiencing very similar feelings about Mother’s Day.

It’s important to be kind to yourself today. Why not buy yourself some flowers? Or even better, if there’s something slightly indulgent you’ve been thinking you’d rather like for some time then today is the day to treat yourself for a change.

Don’t forget it’s a challenging day for other reasons too. For anyone who no longer has their own mother around, or those who may be estranged for some reason, Mother’s Day is also a reminder of what you don’t have. If you are fortunate enough to have your own mother around, try to enjoy being a daughter this Mother’s Day too.

The patient support charity Fertility Network UK has been gathering some useful and supportive advice from others, and here are a couple of the brilliant and really helpful posts they gathered – here from Deborah Sloan and here from Katy Lindemann. And there’s a great post here from Gateway Women’s Jody Day.

Whatever you do today, remember you are not alone – and take care x

Writing workshops

Writing can be a therapeutic response to fertility problems, and fertility counsellor Deborah Sloan is facilitating a new creative writing workshop group in Brighton for men and women who are thinking about their future without much-wanted children.

Using a combination of peer support and creative exercises, each two hour workshop will help you to explore and express the things you may find difficult to share in other areas of your life. The aim of the workshops is to allow you to connect, to support and feel supported and potentially to discover new ways of thinking and being.

You do not need to have any previous experience in writing or creative techniques, and the emphasis is on the process rather than the ‘end product’. The workshops take place in Brighton on Saturday mornings and you can find more details on Deborah’s website.

 

Creative writing for fertility

120px-Inkwell_icon_-_Noun_Project_2512.svgIf you enjoy writing, you may be interested in a special series of group creative writing workshops aimed at exploring and expressing the feelings and emotions brought up by fertility issues.

The five half-day workshops are open to both men and women and will take place in Brighton in East Sussex. They will be run by fertility counsellor and writing facilitator, Deborah Sloan. You don’t have to have any experience of creative writing to join the workshops, and a range of writing prompts are given using music, art, literature and natures.

The dates for 2016 are all Saturdays – the 16 January, 27 February, 2 April, 30 April and 11 June. The workshops can be attended individually as a drop in (dependent upon availability) or can be booked as a course of five. For more information or to book, please contact Deborah on 07753 228616 or at deborah@deborahsloancounselling.com  The workshops cost £30 each or £135 if you would like to attend them all.