Do you feel you are losing your confidence?

People talk about infertility making you feel lonely, or isolated or angry… but one of the things they don’t talk about is the effect it can have on your self-confidence. I’ve never worked out quite what it is about it that saps your confidence so badly – whether it’s the feeling that your body has let you down, that you are somehow less of a woman than those who seem to get pregnant at the drop of a hat; whether it’s the sense of powerlessness that comes from being unable to do anything to change your situation or whether it’s living with that permanently brittle, on-edge feeling of fear of someone announcing a pregnancy or asking you when you’re going to have children.

Whatever it is, it’s a horrible feeling. It can be particularly acute when you’re faced with a fertility specialist on the other side of the desk. Normally forthright women who know their own minds can watch themselves crumble and start behaving like five year olds sent to the head teacher’s study. It’s an odd thing to see yourself acting in such an out of character way, but finding that you are incapable of doing anything about it.

I don’t have any magic solutions, but I hope that maybe knowing it’s not just you will help…

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